Grayson asks: I’m naturally a shy person, and I want to learn how to be confident at work. I know that confidence is key to coming across as a leader, and I definitely want to advance. How can I stop blending into the background and start exuding self-assurance?
Joel answers: Grayson, you’re right to be focusing on building your confidence, as that’s a key trait of great leaders and a cornerstone of executive presence. Without confidence, you won’t increase your visibility at work or have the courage to take risks. And without taking risks and building visibility and influence, you’ll have difficulty reaching the next level. This is an exciting time in your career—you’re launching a new, more confident phase [not “phrase”] that will take you to places you never imagined you could go. Being confident at work takes effort—here’s how to get there.
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Prepare What You’ll Say at Meetings
Thinking through what you’ll bring to a meeting will help you say it with confidence. You’ll also be more articulate, having carefully prepared your ideas. Everything doesn’t have to be completely polished—maybe you have a few ideas to share in a brainstorming session, and you want to get the group’s feedback. Either way, you’ll contribute with more confidence when you feel prepared. Come to the meeting willing to speak up at work.
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Grow a Team of Supporters
When you know you have star players batting for you, you’ll feel your confidence soar. Build relationships with mentors you can learn from, both within and outside of the organization. Cultivate advocates within your company as well—people with influence and credibility who will talk you up to bosses and coworkers. You won’t just benefit from their sway over group opinions—you’ll gain confidence from the insights these relationships give you. Whenever you feel uncertain, visualize this team of people all cheering you on.
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Ask for Feedback
A confident person doesn’t put her head in the sand, avoiding any feedback. Nor does she believe she’s above all criticism. Rather, she has the courage to be vulnerable by asking for others’ input about her performance. When you solicit feedback, others will perceive you as more confident—it shows you’re challenging yourself to improve every day. Consistent feedback from people you trust will also strengthen your performance, raising your confidence even higher.By the same token, if your confidence is being drained by a critical coworker, remember that your response to criticism speaks volumes. If criticized in front of others, invite the critic to continue the conversation over coffee. Actively striving to learn from criticism and understand where it’s coming from will show self-assurance.
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Find a Problem You’re Equipped to Solve
Pinpoint a problem that you’re uniquely poised to solve—something that others will notice, even though they may keep pushing it to the back burner. Tackling a persistent problem head-on shows confidence and ambition, especially when you took the initiative to solve it.
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Celebrate Risks
When you make a bold move that took some courage, celebrate! If you held your ground in a meeting instead of backing down at the first sign of controversy, that’s a milestone. Whether or not you accomplished what you intended, you showed guts, and that’s a victory in itself. Share what happened with one of your biggest cheerleaders—whether your spouse, a coworker, or a close friend—so you’ll have someone to affirm your success.
Like Grayson, almost all of us need to learn how to be more confident at work as we progress in our careers. Keep challenging yourself to step outside of your comfort zone while celebrating your wins, and you’ll be well on your way to a healthy level of self-confidence.
Joel’s executive coaching can help you fast track your development by building your confidence, visibility, and influence at work. Review his executive business coaching services and subscribe to his newsletter, Fulfillment@Work, for ongoing tips and support.